Some people struggle a lot with the choices between being a Good Samaritan: altruistic or putting themselves first, and by doing so being selfish. But in fact, being selfish works in favor of an apparent altruistic behavior.
I usually reflect on how I can make my life better. Sometimes it is very clear when something is wrong, sometimes it’s something hidden between layers that make the “issue” hard to find. After reflecting and thinking thoroughly, to see if I’ve reached the root cause, I draft alternatives to solve the issue that’s keeping me from a merrier life. A good example of this is my dog; he was a gift from my wife, back when she was my girlfriend (almost 11 years ago). At that time, he was living with me, under my parents’ roof, and he used to sleep with me, in my bed. After we got married, and we moved into our own place, my wife “educated” him to stay in his own bed. The reason for doing so: hygiene. When he goes out for number 1 & 2, he usually steps on other dogs’ 1 & 2, not very clean, to say the least. What I realized after a couple of years is that I love to cuddle with my dog, and have him on the bed. How could I solve this?